For years, conversations around screen time have focused almost entirely on children. How much YouTube is too much? Should teenagers be on social media? When should a child get their first smartphone? A new study suggests we may have been asking the wrong question.
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According to research published last month in the peer-reviewed journal Frontiers in Psychology (via Bloomberg), it’s not just children’s screen habits that matter. Parents who are constantly distracted by their phones may unintentionally weaken their emotional bond with their children, potentially leaving lasting developmental and psychological effects. The study surveyed 600 U.S. adolescents aged 12 to 17, many of whom reported feeling ignored or sidelined when their parents were absorbed in their devices.
The phone isn’t the problem. Feeling ignored is
The researchers found that excessive phone use by caregivers can contribute to what’s known as “insecure attachment” — a pattern that may make children more anxious, avoidant, and less confident in relationships later in life. According to Don Grant, a media psychologist, addiction expert, and fellow of the American Psychological Association, those effects can persist well into adulthood if left unchecked.
It “could really unfavorably impact their attachment security, which they will carry for life,” Grant said.
Grant described the issue as more than simply spending too much time on a phone. It’s about being physically present but emotionally absent. One example from the study highlights parents who proudly attended every recital or sports match, only for their children to remember them as constantly looking down at a screen instead of watching the moment unfold.
Why does this study feel different?
We’ve previously covered how excessive screen time and social media can affect children. What’s different here is that the researchers turn the spotlight onto parents instead. Their work represents one of the most comprehensive studies examining how children perceive their caregivers’ technology habits and how those habits shape the parent-child relationship.
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The findings also build on growing research around “technoference” — the idea that digital devices quietly disrupt face-to-face relationships. While earlier studies largely examined its impact on romantic partners, this research suggests the same pattern may be playing out between parents and their children. It also aligns with broader trends. For instance, Bloomberg notes that nearly half of American teenagers surveyed by the Pew Research Center in 2024 said their parents were at least sometimes distracted by a phone during interactions, even though far fewer parents believed it was happening.
The funny thing is that we’ve spent years worrying about children becoming glued to their screens. This study flips that conversation on its head, suggesting the bigger issue may be what children see when they look up. After all, the moments kids tend to remember aren’t the ones spent staring at a screen, but the ones when the people they wanted to connect with were staring at theirs.
